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Friday, May 9, 2008

A Normal Day

It is a Friday. May 9th. Mother's Day is Sunday.

The crisis with Iran must come to a head soon, will it take U.S. troops? The U.N. seems incapable of doing anything, or will not since the longer the madman runs the country the more the American nose gets tweaked to the delight of most of the rest of the world.

The incumbent in the White House has incredibly low approval ratings, Congress is right there with him. With a Presidential election happening in six months both parties are gearing up for their conventions and nominating the candidate they feel will win in November. On the Democratic side the initial front runner is getting very negative press--unheard of before this primary season.

Due to the Middle East situation gas prices are fueling inflation in our markets and causing a lot of concern for all Americans, very much in the stump speeches of the candidates.

The Lakers and Celtics are in the playoffs and there is an excellent chance they will meet in the NBA finals, the Lakers with a superstar.

Terrorism is a concern in Europe with splinter groups setting off bombs in crowded areas over the past three or four years.

It is a Friday. Friday May 9th. Friday May 9, 1980 and I have just gotten home from school, I am a senior, and the phone has rung in our apartment and it is my Dad's New York office calling for him.

As Dad talks on the phone I stand at the window six floors up looking over the park. After he hangs up there is a prolonged silence, then, "Your mother died a little while ago."

It was a Friday. Today is a Friday. Friday May 9, 2008. Twenty eight years since I heard those words. Twenty eight years from a scrawny (about six foot 140 pounds), pimply (severe acne), somewhat insecure kid that was somewhat socially inept, to who I am today. At forty six and approaching my 14th anniversary with Leslie, I have lived with her almostas long as I had with my Mom.

This distance in time place in life would seem to diminish the memories of her as life's routine has not included her for almost three decades; but contrarily many memories are reappearing that had been forgotten. This is for two reasons.

First the girls. From the time they were old enough to ask, "Where's your Mama?" we have spoken of their "Nana" or "Nanners" as I would like to think we would have called their Grandmother Nancy, as living in my heart, my siblings hearts and the hearts of everyone who knew and loved her. Just as we all do and will. As well they know Nana lives in their hearts as well. It was very difficult coming to grips with the death of Mom when we were all very young; it has thankfully been less difficult in discussing and teaching the girls. By acknowledging and recognizing her place in our hearts I am able to call upon her spirit to bring back stories from my youth that included Mom for the girls. As one memory is recalled it triggers other memories as well. Happy memories that warm and instill the joy of remembrance.

The second reason for the regeneration of memories forgotten has been my spiritual awakening and learning the past year. A believer in reincarnation for many, many years it has not been until the past year and more intensely the past several months that I have been able to use the tools of prayer, meditation, affirmation and communion with God to properly place my previously disjointed beliefs into a more focused and positive Belief. Without proselytizing nor getting off track to my purpose in writing this essay, my place today has allowed me a more living experience with Mom and memories than I have had since her passing.

It is a Friday. Friday May 9, 2008. A little groggy from staying up too late I eschewed the 4:38 a.m. alarm and did not go for my morning swim. I rolled over following my back up 5:43 alarm and finally dragged myself out of bed at Leslie's initial 6:00 alarm--our home is alarming. After my quiet time of reading and writing with some coffee, the girls were already up when the school day 7:15 "Daddy Alarm" was ready to rouse them from their dreams and get their morning started. While I showered and dressed they got their school uniforms on then we gathered in the kitchen. I made them breakfast and lunch for Blaire to take to school, Friday is pizza day which Jenna likes and Blaire does not. And I shared with them that today was a birthday, or anniversary that was very important to me, their Aunt Sharon, their Unkey Monkey and their Opa. I told them that on this day in 1980 their grandmother, my Mom, had passed away.

"But she still lives in your heart Dad," said Blaire; Jenna nodding her head in agreement. Soon thereafter their Mom came in and gave them hugs.

Yes she still lives in our hearts. Off they went to school and me to work. It is a normal day. A Friday. Friday May 9, 2008; a normal day. Happy Mother's Day, Mom.

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